Tailor's jokes, proverbs and signs

The customer came to the studio.
- Have you been sewing men's trousers for a long time?
- thirty-seven years.
- Do you have a diploma?
- There is.
- Show me.
- You are welcome!
- See how the ink on the signature burned out!
So thirty-seven years have passed!
- Yes... But still, I would like to know who signed your diploma.
- I do not remember.
- ... Can you sew trousers for my figure?
- Yes I can.
- And I have a special figure! ...
-?
- Here, please pay attention: first I have a stomach ..., then - a stomach ..., then - legs ... I have two of them ...
-?
- So you can sew on such a figure?
- Yes!
- Excuse me, before entrusting you with the fabric, I want to ask you one more thing: when you go home, do the fabrics stay here?
- Yes!!
- Do you lock them up?
- Yes!!
- How many keys do you have?
- two!!!
- And who has the second key?
- I have!!!
- You know, I'll think a little more ...
- !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't like this new dress of yours...

- I can't put on a bottle of vodka!

Announcement: "I'll buy an overlocker not expensive, at least I'll find out what it is."

A young tailor pretends to be a tough guy, meets a girl in a cafe. She, a practical girl, immediately delicately tries to find out his financial situation:

- And what's your job?

- Oh-oh-oh ... I have a very ancient profession, almost the oldest. It became necessary for people immediately after the emergence of the most ancient profession ...

- So you're a pimp...

fairytale anecdote

Ivan talks about the death of Koshchei:

- No, breaking the needle is too easy. I'll put it in the sewing machine. Let him shake it!

If the thread gets confused when basting, the product will be successful and the customer will like it.

A bad customer will not lead to a good one.

To learn how to sew loops, sew a hundred loops. One hundred and one will be good.

Patience and time make satin from a mulberry leaf.

Germany

Silk bags are not sewn.

Germany

Proverbs about clothes and tailors, tailor's expressions, as well as proverbs in which clothes are a metaphor.

A woman's best dress is the one that a man wants to take off immediately (Coco Chanel)

If you want to change a person's clothes, start with his grandmother (Evelina Khromtchenko).

Every year on February 8, in the temples of the Kanto region, which includes Tokyo and the surrounding area, the hari-kuyo ritual, a prayer for needles, takes place.

On this day, needles and pins, which have been used all year, are thanked for their faithful service.

Until the beginning of the 20th century, it was customary to do this at home.

Then the main occupation of the woman was sewing, and the needle was the nurse in the house.

Excerpts from children's writings are another confirmation that politics, as a phenomenon that determines the realities of life, affects fashion.

True, the fashion of past generations is perceived by us and our children through the prism of the present.

For the authors of the following lines, who were born in 1991, "Soviet Union" is already a story that they wrote based on the stories of their grandparents and parents.